Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Watched "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters", Finally
RUN TIME- 88 MINS
WRITER(S)- TOMMY WIRKOLA
STARRING- JEREMY RENNER, GEMMA ARTERTON AND FAMKE JANSSEN
DIRECTOR- TOMMY WIRKOLA
Synopsis taken from IMDb
Hansel & Gretel are bounty hunters who track and kill witches all over the world. As the fabled Blood Moon approaches, the siblings encounter a new form of evil that might hold a secret to their past.
I'd like to start this off by clearly stating that I knew what I as getting/going into watching this film. Watch the trailer, and you can see for yourself exactly what this movie is going to be like. So no, I'm not going to rip it apart for bad acting, or stupid story, or any other nonsense. That would be pointless. This was clearly made for the sake of pure entertainment, and that's how I'll judge it. I'm not taking this movies side in any argument, because quite frankly, as a film it's very weak.
However, as I mentioned above, I knew what this movie was going to entail. So, I never expected an Oscar nominated movie experience, and those that did should think twice before watching or reviewing movies. It's amusing how people will bash films for things that are pointless. After watching any of the trailers or commercials, did you honestly expect to go in and see a five star movie?
It starts off with a modern twist on the classic story, that foreshadows the sibling's journey ahead. I really liked the look of the witch in the beginning, in the candy house. Very reminiscent of some of the deadites in "Army of Darkness". The fact that this movie got an R rating actually saved this movie, because they were allowed to use some scary images and witches as opposed to dulling it down for a younger crowd.
Also, that R rating came in handy for the gore as well! Without the looks of some of the more scarier looking witches, and the gore, this movie really would have been a travesty. Fortunately, those are it's saving graces. Because without them, this would just be another "Van Helsing", and one of them is enough.
I found this flick to be total entertainment. This was never supposed to be a motion picture that requires you to think or pay close-up attention. So if you're going to watch this film, grab a beverage and kick your feet up, lay your head back and relax and just watch. If you've seen it already, you know what I'm saying is true. It's a very fun movie that actually has some good spots of humor throughout. Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton did really good jobs at playing Hansel & Gretel, about as good as you can do for such one dimensional characters.
This cinema isn't even a solid 90 minutes, so even if you absolutely hate it, it won't sting too bad. Going in for fun's sake, you'll have a good time. Just don't judge it on a serious standpoint, comparing it to "The Godfather" and you'll be just fine.
The action scenes are something else that I need to mention. There are some scenes that are actually pretty sweet and juicy with good moves and things that I haven't seen before. For the most part, there's nothing to savvy in the way of these scenes, and a lot of the fights aren't anything memorable. The only thing that makes them stand out is the fact that it's witches and trolls getting in these brawls along with humans.
There is a twist towards the end of the film, right before the final showdown with Muriel (Janssen), the lead villain and very powerful witch, that I did not see coming. Now, it wasn't an epic twist that makes your jaw drop, but it's a twist nonetheless, and it does change the story from there on out.
All in all, I can't say I liked the movie. I can say that I found it entertaining. It's senseless fun and amusement. There's far worse you can watch out there. I will say, and I know most will disagree with me, that I liked this more than "Troll Hunter" (2010). This was at least justifying in how cheesy and bad it was. It never tries to be taken seriously, and that's what saves it from truly failing and falling off the deep end. This would have been even better if I'd gotten to see it in 3D but, that doesn't alter my rating.