The Haunted Trailer will have you Laughing Out Loud

RATED- UNRATED
RUN TIME- 90 MINS
WRITER(S)- CHUCK NORFOLK, STEVEN SCOTT NORFOLK AND TIM NORFOLK
STARRING- RON JEREMY, JOE GRISAFFI AND JEREMY JAMES DOUGLAS NORTON
DIRECTOR- CHUCK NORFOLK



Synopsis taken from IMDb
Two goofy hick brothers (Elvis and Aaron), their crazy redneck Momma and sexy sister (Prissy) must exorcise their mobile home of an ancient demon set free to fulfill the 2012 prophecy, with the help of a low rent TV evangelist named Reverend Wiggems, or the world will end. A Raunchy redneck comedy/horror.




I first watched this film last night, at about 3:00 a.m. Seeing as I knew this was going to be funny, I made sure the mood and setting was right. I can honestly tell you that I was laughing 2 minutes in...

The thing about this film, is that it doesn't take itself seriously. If it did, this film would have a whole other effect. However, Chuck Norfolk knew what type of movie he was making. He wasn't aiming for Oscars. This is a true horror-comedy that comes off likes something you'd catch from Full Moon Features. It's very cheesy in a deliberate way, and stacks up the laughter. 
I've always been an avid fan of dirty, fart and crap jokes, and this film is full of flatulence and feces.

The fact that Ron Jeremy is in this film cracks me up. I always heard that he's a nice, funny guy, and now I've seen it for myself. Ron Jeremy haunting your house as an Indian...ridiculous...but hilarious! Joe Grisaffi had me laughing the most, his performance as momma was funny as hell. He has so many great lines, but my favorite has got to be "smells like cocoa butter and burnt pine cones."

When Reverend Wiggems comes into the picture, it becomes even more over-the-top than before. His attempt at exorcising the trailer is absurd! I always enjoy a movie that's meant to be pure entertainment. It really is enjoyable from beginning to end, even if you're only interested in the humor aspect of the film. Fans of comedy and or horror, will find something for them in this movie.

The acting is overdone, and can be annoying, but it's totally acceptable because this is that type of movie. Clearly, no one was aiming to steal the show, they were just playing dumb, ignorant red necks and they did a good job. They all have moments that'll cause you to laugh to aloud.

The best part about this film is waiting for Ron Jeremy to appear! I was eagerly awaiting his next appearance, because he always shows up at the best moments and does or says something that will make you smack your head and laugh. There's a dance scene towards the end that I found quite amusing, I laughed hard.

All in all, this is a very enjoyable film. It's got a little something for everybody, and it's good for a lot of laughs. Keep your eyes open for this one when it lands, you really shouldn't miss this one. It's not a perfect movie, but it's a damn entertaining one! Pure entertainment.

THIS FILM GETS 3 REAPER SKULLS OUT OF 5

Street Trash (1987)

RATED- UNRATED

RUN TIME- 91 MINS

WRITER(S)- ROY FRUMKES

STARRING- MIKE LACKEY, BILL CHEPIL AND VIC NOTO

DIRECTOR- J. MICHAEL MURO

Synopsis taken from IMDb

When a liquor store owner finds a case of "Viper" in his cellar, he decides to sell it to the local hobos at one dollar a bottle, unaware of it's true properties. The drink causes its consumers to melt, very messily. Two homeless lads find themselves up against the effects of the toxic brew, as well as going head to head with "Bronson", a vietnam vet with sociopathic tendencies, and the owner of the junkyard they all live in. 

This film had a limited theatrical release and hit VHS the same year. In 2010, Arrow Video released a 2 disc set that contained some previously unavailable features.

Before you ask yourselves, the answer is yes, I have just recently seen this film for the first time! This is the type of movie that you really have to be in the mood for. It's a gross, messy fun ride. But if you watch it with the wrong state of mind, you'll tend to find it a bit ridiculous. However, that's the point. It's supposed to be absurd!

I watched this late at night, by myself, and had to keep myself from laughing loud enough to wake up the fiance'! I was hooked from the beginning. This film doesn't hide the fact that it's a low-budget gorefest, that's what makes it so likable. The filmmakers knew what this film was and ran with it, they didn't attempt to do things that try and make it a serious movie.

The acting is pretty bad, it's nothing noteworty. It is what you'd expect from a film like this though. Nope, there is no Christian Bales or Daniel Day-Lewis in this film. Just good old fashioned cheese and gore. That's all folks!

I enjoy movies that are made for fun, especially back then. They had a sort of appeal to them that they just don't have anymore. Now when a movie is low-budget, it's pretty damn bad. I can see why people wouldn't like horror like this, but I've always found humor being the side I love best when eating a horror sandwich. Though, I really don't recommend that you watch it while eating...

Movies like this always have special spot in my heart reserved for them. I feel at home whenever I watch a good or fun movie from the 80's. As you all know, I think the 80's had the best horror films. The 70's had the unbeatable classics like "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", "The Exorcist", "Halloween" and "Black Christmas". The 80's had a more conisistancy among how awesome their films were, though.
If you're a fan of films that strike the gross-out factor, and that hit you with an abundance of gore, this is your movie. Since finally seeing it, I'm glad to be able to chat with friends about it. This is one of those underground classics, and it's not for everyone. I'll be watching this agains soon.

That being said, I won't judge a movie great based on the "fun" factor. Acting and story still count. So, I'm rating this as a film, not on how amusing it is. Enjoyable factor is higher than my rating of the film. Still not a great movie. Just a fun, cult classic.

THIS FILM GETS 3 REAPER SKULLS OUT OF 5

Nailbiter (2013)

 

RATED- R

RUN TIME- 82 MINS

WRITER(S)- PATRICK REA AND KENDAL SINN

STARRING- JOICIE APPELL, JOHN D. BARNES AND EMILY BORESOW

DIRECTOR- PATRICK REA

Synopsis taken from IMDb

The Maguire family is forced to take sudden refuge in a seemingly abandoned storm cellar from a deadly tornado.

This is a film by Patrick Rea, a man who's done short films since back in 2002. He's won Fangoria's Blood Drive contest for his company SenoReality Pictures, along with collaborators Ryan Jones and Josh Robison.

This is yet another film that I've danced around for a bit before finally watching. Chipping away at the old stack of unwatched films one bloody step at a time. I was actually really excited to watch this one, because just reading what it was about made me metaphorically crap in my pants! It's a very well and original concept that adds claustrophobia into the mix, adding that real terror to the horror.

It takes roughly no time to pick up the ball and run with it, instantly compelling you to watch in complete silence. The suspense is in fact, nailbiting, pun intended. Hell, being caught in a tornado would scare the hell out of me, let alone all else that happens. This is a film that you can't let out of your sight, because it's a real situation, it's something that could really happen. Then we get to what's in the basement with them.

 

When thinking of this film, my mind shoots to "Jeepers Creepers". It has that same feel for me. There's a lot of mystery as of what exactly is in the basement with them, keeping you guessing and waiting for glances of it. The suspense makes you imagine something horrendous just around the corner.

Upon revealing the creature, and finding out other twists, the movie ended up letting me down. I was disappointed with it once the credits rolled. I was thirsting for more, and I felt I should have got more from it. The mystery of it all bothered me, I wanted some type of explanation.

Then, the movie sat with me for a few days. I started to like it again. I found it to be one of those films that you really have to let soak in and absorb in order to truly get it. There's still a lot to be explained, but it doesn't bother me as much now that I've ran the film through my head a few times. It's a really good creature feature. I'm thinking that as time goes on, I'll come to enjoy it more and more. Just like I did with the aforementioned "Jeepers Creepers". The point is that you're thrown into the mess with the characters, and you're fighting with them to survive.

Ultimately, this film is full of suspense, jumps and scares. It's not as great as I expected it to be, but I've come to really enjoy it! I'm sure this will be one I pull off the shelves every couple of months and rewatch. I'd love to view it with director's commentary, to really take me inside the movie. You always pick up more once you've watched it with commentary. I'm giving this movie a fair rating, because I'm still uncertain of if I'd give it higher, but I certainly wouldn't give it lower.

THIS FILM GETS 3 REAPER SKULLS OUT OF 5

V/H/S/2 is worth rewinding and watching again

If you follow my blog, or read often, you know that I love horror anthologies. In all honesty though, I don't think there's a horror fan alive who don't like anthology films. 'V/H/S/2 is the follow-up to the cult smash hit 'V/H/S', which hit last year. Being a big fan and supporter of the first film, I was more than ready to experience the next chapter in this series. Just like the first film, this one has a nice set-up of directors of all variety. Offering us new stories, and new points of view, there's something for every kind of horror fan in this sequel.

I watched the film for the first time with some friends last night. I woke up this morning and gave it a 2nd viewing before my review, allowing me to let it soak in some more in my head. I was pleased with this movie, it's good stuff. But, it's not like the first film. They don't have the same feel to them. The first came off like a snuff film; very gritty and haunting. 

This sequel, comes off as a lot more fun and not as serious. There's some good stuff in this movie though, a ton of creativity and heart. 'V/H/S/2' is a really good installment in what may become the best new horror series out there right now.



"Tape 49"
Director- Simon Barrett
Writer- Simon Barrett

This is the story that was the glue holding the other stories together. It's the one the film starts with, and we go back to it in between viewing the VHS tapes. It's the current story, and it follows two private investigators who are looking for a missing college student. They break into his house to look for clues or,  anything that may lead to where he is. They find blood on one of the walls, and a setup of several TVs and an unlimited amount of VHS tapes. The male investigator leaves the female investigator, Ayesha, to watch the cassettes while he roams the house looking for clues.

Much like the first film, you get angles of the viewer, in this film it's Ayesha, watching the tapes with her back turned to the rest of the house. We, the viewers, see weird things going on in the background that she doesn't notice. Adding that touch of suspense. As the other stories are told and allow this one to unfold piece by piece, it still leaves you with questions. But it's a good, well-told story that is sinister, and fun.  3.5/5

"Phase I Clinical Trials"
Director- Adam Wingard
Writer-  Simon Barrett

As a small price for getting his eyesight back, a man agrees to let his life be watched through his new government implanted eye, as part of a test trial. He's warned that there may be glitches, but what he ends up experiencing is much, much more grim. He starts seeing ghosts in his house, more specifically, a little girl, who tends to sleep under the covers of his bed. I thought it was really creepy seeing the small child outline under the comforter. I know that I for one, would have crapped my pants, and hightailed it the hell out of there.

Then a girl incorporates herself into the mix, claiming she knows about what's going on and why our lead is seeing weird things. It hits you abruptly and doesn't let up. The last five minutes of this story are extremely suspenseful. It gets pretty bloody too, which is always a nice touch. Overall, I wasn't overly happy with this story, but I did like it. I just didn't do anything really new for me. 2/5

"A Ride in the Park"
Director- Gregg Hale and Eduardo Sánchez
Writer- Jamie Nash and Eduardo Sánchez 

 This film revolves around a male biker who's out for an early morning run to get his heart pumping. His camera is mounted on his helmet, so everything you see is from the top of his head. I liked that idea, it was different from just seeing through the characters eyes. His trail ride is interrupted when a woman stops him for help, and begins regurgitating projectile blood-vomit. She then bites our main character and the film progresses from his POV as he turns into a zombie.

The zombies in this movie are actually pretty decent. In a world where the zombie realm is overplayed and overused, it's nice to see some new and creative life be breathed into the rising dead. These zombies are actually intelligent, which makes them fierce! You can actually tell how and what they're feeling through the noises, grunts and groans that they make. They're fast, fierce, and brutal. It ends with a bang, and has some humor to it, very entertaining. 3/5  

"Safe Haven"
Director- Timo Tjahjanto
Writer- Timo Tjahjanto

This is the 2nd to best one in the whole damn movie. This one hits hard, with a dark and twisted-but desirous  story. A film crew goes to Indonesia to do a report on a cult going on. A man, "The Father", of the cult sleeps with children to purify them. He leads a large commune of people who believe in his ideology, that they're on their way to a higher plane of existence. 

Things get out of control suddenly and fast. You're thrown into the middle of some sick, ritualistic things that start hammering you with jitters and puzzlement. It's intense and nail biting. The ending gets silly though, and loses that firm grip of fear it built up. Overall it's a damn good story, but it would have been a lot better if the ending had some solidity to it. 3.5/5

"Slumber Party Alien Abduction"
Director- Jason Eisener
Writer- Jason Eisener 

 This is by far my favorite of the bunch this time around. This is the scariest, and most suspenseful out of all of the stories shown. The camera is first hand POV for the first half, the last half has the camera mounted on the family dog.  Finally, a really well done, scary alien movie. The fact this this is a short film actually helps the integrity of it. It keeps things short and sweet, causing you to sort through the mayhem of what's going on. A group of youngsters, young and older, undergo an alien invasion during a slumber party.

The cherry on top was how genuine the characters came off. The children acting like imbeciles gave it that sense of realism it needed for this story to be pulled off. The extraterrestrials are eerie as hell looking! They fit the perfect description of what you expect of "Greys".  Bloody well done. 4.5/5

 'V/H/S/2' is that new amusement ride going on in the horror genre that everyone's going to have to try. It's a really good, well handled film. And a big compliment to it's predecessor. Great anthology movie, and I hope there's more to come. At this quality, I'd say I'd be down for at least 5 of these films. It's not a perfect horror film, but it gets a lot right.

THIS FILM GETS 3 1/2 REAPER SKULLS OUT OF 5